Beech helps us learn how to love

Cartoon by Jonny Hawkins, with his permission

When we are criticising others we look at them, reports Tara Brach, through ‘a narrow aperture’: we don’t allow ourselves to see the wider picture with all their good points. Or how they are doing their best despite trying circumstances or other problems. All we see is what irks us.   We may be able to resist saying something mean or critical out loud, but the intolerant thought is still there and makes itself felt across the space between us.

When we feel superior to others like that, the flower remedy is of course Beech.    We look down our noses from our ivory tower of superiority, just as the Queen of Trees gazes down on its neighbours.  And the beech allows no plants to grow too close, it deliberately distances itself from others. 

Those in the mood requiring Beech are sure they are right and that others are wrong or inferior in some way.  When the need for Beech is particularly strong the afflictive emotion is as close to hate as that of Holly. It’s ‘hate’ because we are ‘othering’ the criticised person, rendering them as someone *other*, someone who is ‘Not one of us.’  Whereas love is selfless, connects and includes everyone, hate is selfish, disconnects and excludes. This is unhealthy and unsustainable because we all need each other in order to survive and thrive.  Social media has a lot to answer for …

Taking Beech helps us to see others in all the glory of their humanity, regardless of their flaws and failings that we have too.  And like us they need understanding, tolerance and compassion to help them get through each difficult day.